Can you imagine a world where abortion is illegal?

Some of you just cringed. Others of you may have rejoiced.

To some of you, that would be a faulty step backwards, away from female autonomy and freedom. To others, that would seem to be a glorious thing, an indication of increased value on all human life.

Some of the most heated debates are when people ask, “But what about pregnancy in the case of rape? Incest? What about single mothers who will have to raise these children? What if her choice to keep a child would leave her financially or relationally unsupported, by either the father of the baby or by her family? What if it was one mistake that side-rails her education, her career, and her dreams?””

Church, these things are real. How will we respond? We can’t go after the issue of abortion and not be willing to confront the engine that is spinning the gears on the whole conveyor belt. If we’re going to actually help women, we have to go way further back and way deeper down.

And what you find there, Church, is going to inconvenience you far more than you may realize. If we claim to actually care about human dignity and see value in all life, we’re going to have to prove it.

Every Child Wanted

No one was meant to raise a child alone; this cannot be a thing. If it takes a village to raise a child, then, Church, we need to step up. Single parent families have such a heavy load. Church, we need to care.

And I’m not just talking about the women’s ministry pastor, or the food bank volunteers. Certainly there is a percentage of you already serving and sacrificing, but there is also a high percentage of people who don’t understand what the big deal is or who relegate the task to “professionals.” If the entire church community leaned in for single mothers, made eye contact, offered to carry the diaper bag, offered to babysit, invited for a meal, shared wisdom, showed up for school plays or sports events, things would feel a lot different in this country.

And what if those mothers determine that they are not ready or fit to raise a child, yet they courageously carry the baby to full term and deliver? More Christians will need to lean in to foster and adopt, or at the very least, watch out for those who do.

If even two families from every church in our nation would adopt or foster, we would effectively care for every child in the system. So, why don’t we? Perhaps for the same reason that the woman is seeking an abortion?

We hesitate to welcome in a child because they are seen as a burden rather than as an investment. We’ll have to transform the way we treat ALL children, and give them more respect instead of treating them as an interference to our schedules, plans and dreams. We’re going to have to change the way we joke and dishonour families and belittle children; we may have to cancel our summer vacation plans; we’re going to have to trust that there is fulfillment beyond self-actualization and in the sacrifice for another generation.

Church, if we want to eliminate abortion, we need to be ready to break the stigma off of single mothers and embrace children in a deeper way.

Every Man Responsible

Sex is such a powerful force; biologically it can bind the souls of men and women to each other and has the potential to create new life on the earth. We’ve done everyone a great disservice when we reduce it to a recreational euphoric pastime with zero ramifications or further implications.

The goal is that every time a woman becomes pregnant, there is a committed man at her side, ready to shoulder the load with her. Unfortunately, even within faithful marriages, this is not always the reality.

If you want abortion to be illegal, we’ll have to address the root structures. Church, we’re going to have to do better than a yearly sermon on the list of sexual sins God doesn’t like. We need to lean in and develop atmospheres that empower men to protect and defend the dignity of all women, learning to see them as far more than objects for their sexual pleasure, because we have to eradicate rape and incest that leaves women as victims in the shadows.

These crimes are happening far more regularly than is recorded in national statistics because there is such a mixed bag of shame and regrets that women are sorting through. If it hasn’t happened to you, chances are that it has happened to a sister, a mother, a co-worker, or a friend. They may just not know how to talk about it.

Men, you’re going to have to deal with your dark secrets and your hidden past. Fathers, you’ll need to find a way out of shame, so you can reclaim your voice of instruction and offer support for other young men.

Young men, you will need to fight tirelessly to find your way in a deceitful culture that is constantly inviting you to a hedonistic lifestyle, but then vilifying you (justifiably) when you play out what you see in pornographic experiences. You need to get smart and get over yourself. Sexual expression is not the highest goal of humanity.

We’re going to need to drain the demand for the pornographic industry, like a physician drains the site of an infection. I don’t care how financially lucrative it is.

Church, if we want crimes against women to stop , we must address the epidemic that is distorting the image of men, women, and sexual experience.

Every Woman Empowered

Some of the highest motivators for women seeking an abortion are the retaining of her body image, of her career and lifestyle or of a relational status.

Women who face unplanned pregnancies are scared. And reasonably so. I’d be terrified.

Women are smothered daily by messages that tell her how to succeed, how to be admired, and how to not be alone. She senses that she must not be too needy. She must make a certain amount of money in order to be self-sufficient. Babies threaten this.

She is told that she must maintain a certain image, weight, and body shape in order to attract and continue to satisfy a man. Babies threaten this.

She must find identity in achievements and work ethic. Babies threaten this.

So then, a true empowerment must release women from unrealistic pressures. It is the only way that she could face pregnancy without fear.

The Church is going to need to trumpet the message that women are valuable for who they are as individuals, at the very core of their being, and not for what they contribute to the world or for how sexy they can manage to be every day of their lives.

We need to release a message that says, “Women, we will lead men to stand up for you, be committed to you, and never objectify you or expect an unrealistic image perfection from your body. When you feel most vulnerable, in a place of pregnancy, you will be defended, not abandoned, by the man in your life.”

We cannot eliminate abortion and ignore the messed-up system that crushes her soul.

And, at the same time, we need to remember that many women who seek abortions are married, are financially secure, and just aren’t willing to face the personal sacrifice that childbearing will bring. We need to recognize that legitimate empowerment of women will result in them releasing their strength and life to the next generation. We cannot claim to be empowering women, but then lead her to a narcissistic existence. She is made for far more than that.

It is not so simple, is it? If the Church is going to raise her voice on the issue of abortion, I would invite her to also raise her voice on the issues that are fueling abortion.

It begins with self-awareness and eyes to see the big picture. It should lead to hearts full of compassion that lean in to share truth, to give practical support, to adopt, and to protect all lives. Yes, unborn babies, but also the men and women who feel overwhelmed and trapped.

We can do better.

Note to the Reader:

I know that there are countless more unique circumstances that women find themselves in when they consider the option of abortion. I know that this post today is not all encompassing. I simple wanted to share some thoughts in a way that would stimulate compassion and action on the part of Christ-followers.

If you have chosen an abortion in the past or pushed someone towards it, (or anything else that you know eliminated a pregnancy), please know that we at The Union do not wish to impose further pain or shame on you. If you need to reach out and talk to someone about it, please do not hesitate. It would be cruel of us to bring up the topic and then not serve at least as a link to some support.

If you (or someone you know) are currently pregnant and considering ending it, please also reach out. We are a part of a beautiful local church community full of people who would want to stand beside you, or adopt your child if that is what you feel needs to happen. If you are NOT local to BC, we can do our best to link you with an understanding community as well.

Dear Church: On the Topic of Abortion - It's Not So Simple.